For this blog post I would like to discuss all of the things we have learned from our time in Texas. Its been an interesting couple of months, with some lows and highs, but overall Madelyn and I have had a great adventure. Here are some things we have learned:
Madelyn and I have realized that we look dang good in burnt orange
We have learned when jogging around town lake its better to reserve some of your energy so that you can sprint past the foul smelling bat colony
If you are going to start an adult type buisness, its important to include XXX somewhere in your title. Club Exxxtasy (in Oklahoma) and the Adult Video MegapleXXX (Outskirts of Austin)
If you are planning on moving to Texas get ready to become familiar with H.E.B.
We have come to the realization that none of the streets in Austin make any sense, 2222? 2244? Maybe its a way for the native Austin population to identify the tourists.
When you have a neon sign made that reads "The best Mexican Food in the World", you better be able to back up that claim. Especially when you are naming the resturaunt "Matts", and not something more authentic like "Jose's"
You can get rain checks for items that Walgreens has on sale but is currently out of. The senior population in Austin takes full advantage of this loophole
Texas also weeds out the non-natives by naming their cities and pronouncing them completely different. Gruene, Pflugerville, San Marcos, New Braunfels. If you cannot pronounce these correctly than you must not be from around here
There is no such thing as too big of a Texas Flag
Texans LOVE outlet malls
Standing at the entrances and exits of the freeways may be a good way to make some money
Everything in Texas is actually bigger, this is no myth. Madelyn and I have enjoyed the big cups at restaurants.
The lotto is not a good way to becoming a millionaire
We have learned that if you have lived your life wearing boots everyday, and never owning a pair of tennis shoes, then at the end of your life.................... you will have a lot of stories about boots.
Zebras bite, be aware
Even though smoking is outlawed all over Austin, this does not include concerts outdoors
Mapquest is not always correct
Taco Bueno is NO Bueno
Madelyn and I have had to explain a number of times that we aren't, and don't know any polygamists.
Always check you bed for tiny sharks
Trailer technology has come a long way since the early 80's, double wide is now the standard...... two stories? wrap around porches? I could point you in the direction of some nice dealerships on I-35
The Grassy Knoll is about as exciting as you are imagining
Oklahoma is about as exciting as you are imagining
Madelyn is deathly afraid of Ostriches
People in Utah think there is nothing in Texas, people in Texas think there is nothing in Utah
Cutting down your own Christmas tree is something everyone should do at least once
After living in a new city for two months you are still at least 4 months away from memorizing all of the TV stations
No matter what city you are in, if you are feeling home sick, you can always go to Costco.
Texans will use any drop in temperature as an excuse to wear their favorite sweaters and coats, even though it might only be 60 degrees.
Texans like trucks
When you have a job you have money but no time, when you don't have a job you have time but no money
1 comment:
Cody - you are so funny! Maybe you ought to look into writing a newspaper column for a job. You're at least as funny as Robert Kirby (if not MORE funny) and he makes a pretty good living at the Trib!
I like to read and reread your posts when I need a good laugh.
--Kathryn
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